An article about an article

06-08-2010
Friday

Today evening one of my friend Mr:Sanju suddenly pinged me in gtalk and asked “Deepu can you write an article for me ?”

I was taken aback thinking is this guy gone out of mind to ask me to write an article that too to me who have not even written anything of so kind in my entire life…

Then I understood he is trying to pull my leg . I thought ok this time I am not going to leave it like that let me play around with it .

And I replied ” what exactly do you need”.

Then he told “you are free to select any topic anything whatever you need but by today evening I need an article”

My doubts were changing to veracity as he was demanding .Just then the next biggest question that popped into my mind ahead of whom all he was trying to make fun of me. Asking in gtalk will lead me not to doubt him but I was sure there was something fishy about it …may b my other friends were also involved in making me a joker.

Then I was replying to him as if I have written 50 articles and more 70+ presentations in various topics…”today evening …emmm ..it is impossible I don’t have time….”

“Will try for tomorrow …”

My friend replied as if he was very satisfied…. “thank u tomorrow morning is fine”….more things started looming in my mind…. What is he trying to do ….??

Is he really asking for any help or is he trying to pull my leg again …?

Then I asked him the ultimate question “y do you need it ?for what ? y suddenly ? tell me everything in detail or else I won’t do it”

I don know how I could write that entire sentence in a single go …it was almost like putting the next curious move in chess and shouting aloud checkmate….and grinning with raised eye brows and with the expression which would have almost said “ what is your next move…buddy ”

Then my friend replied politely “I have to submit an article for my magazine please help me doing it and don tell this to anyone”

There he is with the ultimate truth and I was shivering like a leaf stuck by storm … thinking OMG..!!! this guy is serious…and what have I done I was giving him false hopes about some gr88 article which I would b preparing and giving him.

By telling the truth he left me alone with the gr88 hilarious job of writing an article as he thought I would need some time to think and write his so called luminous article.

Actually I was feeling sick…what have I done…?

I almost wanted to yell at him telling no don’t leave the chat room I want to tell some more that I am not a writer or author as u think I am ….

I don’t even know what an article is….

But I couldn’t do any …because I couldn’t upset my friend with the cheap game I was trying to play with him.

Because I was sure he would be very angry when he come to know the truth about me .

Then I decided ok let me try writing an article. Actually I decided to cheat again will be the appropriate word

I tried to get some already existing articles from Google….global warming , go green, effects of politics ,politics in collages…blah blah blah..again blah blah

Ohh my god the list never ends and it was already making my head bang each time I see the length of the article and all the boring stuff it contained.

The more I read the more deeply I was falling in to the deep crater of sleep.

Then I rejected the idea of copying someone else’s article .At least u will have to read the whole article once even to copy .i was too lazy to do that even though with whole heart I wanted to help my friend.

‘Then I thought at least I should put some sort of effort to it and I decided to write my article ….my first article.
so even though I am writing my first article I thought taking help from Google mamu is not a bad idea….

Then as I remember some gr88 personality has said first things first… I started writing in the google search bar “Articles in english”

The results of the search actually made me jump from my seat and I wanted to shout at google “ mamu I have asked about articles not the A,An, The….

The real article. The definition of that boring stuff which I was reading before.”

I became sad…thinking about my friend I became mediocre..thinking about his anger I became horribly miserable

Then I decided I will write something which I feel like and give him .

Then I thought what are the things that makes someone actually write an article.

Then I started struggling with my mind ….

Yes the first thing is the topic…

It should be something which the author of the article likes or dislikes …in my words I would say it should be something which he or she wants to tell others i.e.; they desperately wanted to convey as they don’t have any other means they wrote it as an article.

Then I started brain storming …about all the variety of topics which I can come across…from barack obama to lenin….from ninth universe to booker prize.

OMG where am I stuck up …my mind started cursing me ….topics still started looming around my head … I could so many topics.. but couldn’t settle down on anything ..i was becoming impatient…

I thought the only way of escape was to tell my friend sorry I can’t do it. Though he will get angry on me I will get out this misery of preparing the article.

Then I pinged him in gtalk and told him I don’t know any topic….u can ask someone else to do the same.

His reply made me curse myself for not telling my friend earlier that I can’t do this ..because in the mean time my friend had already told everybody else to expect a terrific article by tomorrow morning..

I was almost shocked by his reply.OMG what will I do ….if I had a gun I would have shot him dead.

Then with a confused smiley I came back to I will of I will write an article for my friend.

Then I thought forget topic.. will put the topic at last .

Then I thought what b people doing after they get a topic to write an article. Generally they will be gathering facts about the “topic” I also googled many facts.

But the more I started researching about something it would hit something else which I like or dislike so that I was easily drifted from topics to topics.

Then I understood this is the problem that occurs when u like a variety of topics.

Then I tried to control my urge to drift from topics to topic decided to keep a hold on my likes and dislikes to a comparatively petite area.

Then I thought what would b the next step then I understood checking for the accuracy of the facts that I have acquired through various means.

On checking the correctness of the facts which I gathered all my likes and dislikes began shifting places ..i became more confused….i tried to ignore my confusions and tried to go ahead in writing my so called article. On further verification of facts I was becoming more and more perplexed and irritated .

Then I was forced to go to my back up plan as decided earlier kill an author and take his article.

I was feeling the pleasure which a shoplifter feels before he shoplifts something precious.

I searched for already existing articles and started reading and simultaneously editing it to make it mine to give it my so called superior touch.

I was overjoyed with my editing skills …I was praising myself for my talent of pilfering some good authors hard slogged work to my smart work.

As the editing progressed I was seeing my friend graciously admiring my article - the hard work and pain which I took in preparing such a dazzling article in such a short notice. The devil inside me was indeed overwhelmed.

The editing progressed for some more hours. As the hours passed something began to pricking my mind ,something or somebody started telling me what I am doing is not correct I am actually stealing somebody else’s glory . The devil inside me defended me very powerfully . but the defense was losing by each passing hour, and with in some hours I deleted the article which I have created through editing.

I was miserable ,now that I don’t have anything to offer to my friend Mr: Sanju. But by now I had understood how to write an article,and I also discovered it could not b written in a short time. For writing an article at least u need keen interest on something which I knew I never had towards anything. So I decided not to write an article, tell my friend the hard truth that I can’t write an article.